the moral of the story is, "don't mess with Allison Argent."Kassie: god I want to smush Stiles's face into Scott's face
Kassie: give or take various other pretty faces who would go very nicely with their faces
Kassie: but like. sometimes, I try to think about Allison/Scott/Stiles trying to have a threesome and it usually ends with Allison like. sitting naked in Stiles's desk chair, playing Pokémon, because Skittles have had all these years of pent up and unacted upon tension and they completely forgot that she was there.
Kassie: Allison gets REALLY aggressive about playing Pokémon.
Kassie: full on screaming at the gameboy when she's fighting Wendy's Miltank or when she accidentally KOs a legendary
Kassie: Skittles still do not remember that she is in the room with them
Kassie: when she leaves to go have sex with Isaac or Lydia or someone else, she passive-aggressively leaves the door open
zani: lol god i love allison
Kassie: because well, if they're going to do that, then they can run the risk of explaining themselves to the Sheriff when he gets home :]
zani: oh god stiles would be SO FLUSTERED
zani: and scott, all sheepish
Kassie: and the Sheriff would just be like …*sighs* did you boys use a condom. because if you didn't, I'm gonna have to tell Scott's mom and take you both to get tested, maybe you got something the same way that the virgin Mary got pregnant without having sex so just to be safe… boys, did you use a condom. *folds arms over his chest and gives them a totally serious face*
zani: and stiles is just too afhadghsfdkgl to respond but scott is like "of course we did, sir!" because responsible scott uwu
Kassie: and then the Sheriff is like, "well good, so what do you boys want on the pizza tonight? the usual? you can get more creative than that tonight, tho, we have a coupon. and there's one for a free order of cheesy breadsticks, you guys up for some cheesy breadsticks? :]"
Kassie: and they're still just sitting there, naked save for the bed sheet
zani: stiles can't even tell his dad he should be eating something healthy instead, he just buries his face in scott's shoulder and giggles forever
Kassie: legit giggling or desperate, "oh god help me why is this my life" giggling?
zani: about half and half
Kassie: and once he has the order, the Sheriff just kinda moseys off while humming, "Can't Buy Me Love" and closes the bedroom door behind him because he was a teenage boy once and there's a good 45 minutes until the pizza gets here so he assumes that they're going to get up to something and good for them, as long as they're being safe and Sheriff doesn't have to tell Melissa uwu
Kassie: and considering Stiles is still really dkghsksdf the something that they get up to is really just like. cuddling and Scott attentively petting Stiles's hair and nosing at him and kissing him all over his face and being like, "hey it's okay"
Kassie: and even when Scott gets him calmer, Stiles is just like, "but I can't shake the feeling that something is wrong"
Kassie: and Scott's like, "yeah didn't we close the door, and your dad isn't the kind of guy who just comes in without knocking"
Kassie: and they look at each other
Kassie: and there's a silent moment of realization
Kassie: and they both go, "fuck it, ALLISON"
Kassie: and in the middle of going down on Lydia, Allison just pauses and smirks like the Cheshire Cat and feels immensely pleased with herself.